Your desire and drive to look at porn is not going to go away by getting married and if you don’t there will be many negative repercussions on your marriage immediately. You may think, now that I can be intimate with my wife porn will no longer be an issue. Marriage is to be a complete devotion to each other.Your relationship to God comes first then your relationship to our spouse. If your not prepared to leave vices behind before getting married your dragging everything that comes along with it into the marriage. Lust us the opposite of love. “It is direction us to a destination. It is driving us away. It’s like a car that is driving us of a cliff. Its it the impact at the bottom of the chasm that destroys us, but lust is simply the vehicle to get us there” – Overcoming Lust in a Sex Crazed World. Jesusaid if your eyes areallowing darkness in (porn) than your whole body will be full of darkness. This will affect your future marriage in more ways than one.
Here are 3 practical reasons for the Christian man to leave porn In the dust before tying the knot:
Honoring God before marriage, sets you up to honor God with your Marriage
Bringing ongoing sin into marriage is not wise, if you become porn free before marriage and set yourself up for the best possible intimacy and relationship with your future spouse. If you’re still looking at porn prior to marriage, now is the time to cut it out of your life for good. The wages of sin is death – Romans 6:23. When someone dies it everyone around him or her is impacted. When you look at porn you are dying spiritually. Wither your single, in a serous relationship or engaged, by looking at porn there will be a serious block in your relationship with God. The spiritual death produced will reveal it self in your thoughts with guilt and amind riddled with lust. This will affect our ability to lead your wife or girlfriend in prayer and in the word. Down the road leading a family. The lust that drives you too look at porn often lingers around by taking up massive amounts of head space. Honoring God with your thought life and living a life where porn is a part of it is simply not possible. If you look at porn while your married, your spouse will not only feel this sin but with porn she will feel like she is being cheated on. It will be devastating to intimacy with your wife by stifling love and the commitment.
Being one with God and one with your wife is Gods design, when we don’t follow this design we bring both relationships to a dangerous precipice. God’s word says that he who joins him self with a harlot becomes one spirit with her ( 1 Corinthians 6:) and spiritually we are becoming one flesh with the woman in porn, this diving you from God and your future wife. The word says that we should never be joined to a prostitute (1 Corinthians 6:15- author paraphrase) and that is what we are doing essentially when we look at porn. Your Alienated from God with guilt, shame and a mind consumed with lust. Also from your future wife with a dualistic approach love, believing that you can be satisfied sexually with porn and your wife. By viewing porn you’re placing an outside person in your marriage in a place that was only designed for your wife. Porn drives a wedge in your relationship with God because you’re meant to be one with Him. God. Addiction to porn inhibits your intimacy with God and your spouse or future spouse, Both keeping you from finding lasting joy fulfillment and purpose.
Porn leads to disappointment
The women featured in porn are paid to do all kinds of things that your wife may or may not do. Either way what your seeing on the screen likely won’t translate to your bedroom. This sets you up to be unsatisfied on the marriage bed. With porn you can access it by simply turning on your phone, with marriage sex does not work like this. You need to love your wife, pursue her heart first. Porn leaves love completely out of the equation. Your wife will want you to give her attention, love and a listening ear before you get to do the whahikii sneaky. “At the same time, Satan has stolen sex and distorted it into something hideous and dangerous. The sex Satan sells is a counterfeit — a melting wax statue of the real thing. – Marshal Segal (writer and managing editor of desiringgod.org) Porn portrays a counterfeit sex that only distorts and confuses what is true love. It is like a crumpled up piece of paper thrown in the trash because its useless, then someone pulls it back out of the trash and says lets sell this. Sex is God design in the context of marriage between man and wife. Take sex out of that context and the result is only regret and corruption.
Porn and trains your brain for immediate gratification leading to addiction and disappointment. The same chemicals are released in your brain when you look at porn, norepinephrine and dopamine, as cocaine and heroin users. Every time you look at porn you need a little bit more or a little bit more hardcore to satisfy your desire. Do you realize that your desire is never satisfied with porn? The truth about porn is you can view porn but it will never satisfy, then you just need more and still no satisfaction. The satisfaction curve is actually going down. This is called the law of diminishing marginal returns. Increased input of porn to your head, through your eyes the lamp of the body, leads to less and less satisfaction and a circle of dark disappointment. Do you want to develop the brain chemistry of an addict and disconnect yourself from your relationship with Jesus Christ? Think if Porn as garbage in garbage out policy. The output is relationships. Porn into your brain, negatively affects your relationships, primarily with the Lord then with everyone else you love. Being alone, clicking away, multiple tabs open on a computer, looking at porn produce nothing but more isolation and loneliness. Real Relationships contrarily contain elements like courtship, emotional connection, and interaction with the other person leading to healthy growth. Which do you desire for your future? Make the choice to change your life today.
Be prepared to meet your wife
A porn free life prior to marriage honors God, your spouse, and prepares you to meet your wife. By Honoring God with your body your more in tune with what his will is for your life – Romans 12:1-2 (author paraphrase) This will not only help you choose the right spouse but be better prepared for what’s next in your life. Porn is an idol that demands your time and steals your joy. When your life is porn free you will more clearly reflect the Glory of God making you more attractive to your prospective mate. If your eye is the lamp to your body and your looking at porn then your whole body is full of darkness – (Matt 6:22-23 author paraphrase) this is not so attractive to a Christian woman. Consider these truths, apply the word of God and set yourself up for success.
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